Fashion Police Strike Again!

Welcome to the U of A World of "Fashion"!

Themes featured this season for women:

• Short shorts and micro-mini jean skirts
• Elton John/Mary Kate Olsen/Nicole Richie/ski goggle sunglasses from 1980
• Leggings, leggings, leggings
• Tank tops, layered tank tops, and tunic tank tops
• Flip flops ad nauseum... ugggghhh!!!! Flip flops! Please banish these horrid shoes!
• Long necklaces
• Low-slung, oversized belts paired with tunic tanks or babydoll dresses
• Which brings me to babydoll dresses... AKA the Britney "preggers" look... AKA heinousness

So let's begin our virtual fashion tour...

Starting out with a classic college campus scene... the "Pie a Pi" fundraiser...

... where men smash tins of whipped cream into Pi Phi's faces.

I personally like the "Sassy Yet Classy" tee. Also note the neon yellow tank top, which is a popular look here this season, as well as the ubiquitous micro-mini shorts and jean skirts, which appear to be worn at a unanimously short length.

Next up... Oversized sunglasses that remind me of my mom and grandma 25 years ago...


More oversized shades...

Jean shorts appear to be a hot 80s comeback look (this is not good, people), and I have to add that the girl on the right is just way too big to be wearing that skimpy top, especially with no bra.

And more big shades...

Note all of these women are wearing flip flops (the horror!) and these two are particularly uncreative in their tank/denim combos. Booooorrrring...

Next up... LEGGINGS... when and how (mainly HOW) did these things make a comeback? OMG!!!

These are a total nightmarish blast from the past... next thing you know they are going to bring that store called "Units" back again!!!

The cropped black legging appears most popular, paired here with a layered tank top and also with a jean mini skirt -- and it goes without saying that flip flops are the shoe of choice.


Here they are paired with standard tanks. At least the chick on the right ventured out on a limb and paired hers with flats instead of flops. Good choice! Even if it does remind me of something I would have worn 20 years ago to junior high. But I bet she's not even 20 yet, so she wouldn't know that this look has been there and done that already. Sigh...

I'm screaming on the inside...

... because there's something very "Flashdance" or "Fame"-like about leggings paired with "off the shoulder" tees.

And here are two alternative leggings looks...

The grey "sporty" leggings (and headband, which also appears to be making a repeat fashion visit... while it frightens me to say it --- I am waiting for the scrunchie to show up soon -- and maybe even the banana clip too!! Now that would be sweet...) and the legging shorts.

The next look: The Low-Slung, Oversized Belt...

The girl on the left struck me as excrutiatingly high maintenance, but that dress is so totally unflattering with that belt cinched around her pelvis, which makes the dress material bulge into a FUPA-like look. I suppose I prefer the look with jeans & a tunic, like the girl on the right... but then again, no, I just don't prefer the look.

And recycling one of last year's most ridiculous styles... the babydoll dress:

Ugggghhh... this is really so Britney Spears jamming Cheetos, Taco Bell, and Starbuck's Frappuccinos into her mouth. This is Britney at her worst. This is Britney gone to seed... this is just bad. Bad. Bad. Bad.

And a couple more of last season's looks...

I have to give props to the girl on the left for wearing the Lindsay Lohan hat, but the pants (stretch fabric too tight in the butt and wide at the leg) are so totally last year. Please! As for the girls on the right, yeah, not good. The Vans are like last decade, they don't have the figures for those skirts, and they have too much belly for those tight tops. My guess is they're members of Omega Mu looking for a Tri Lamb party.

And it wouldn't be fair to just discuss women... here are a few wild Arizona stallions for you:

Not only is the crooked baseball hat still a "cool" look (why? I will never know), but the "Air Jordan" look is making a mighty return from the graveyard of the 1980s. In other sad news, American men continue to wear messy, oversized and untucked clothing.

Dud city... baseball hats gone bad:

No wonder my single friends say there are no good men out there. Look what we have to choose from! Dumb and dumber... and may I add, the baseball hat look is fine on a rainy Sunday afternoon while reading the paper in a cafe, or while working out at the gym, but they really are overworn by men in this country.

The "70s Superstars" --- AKA Greg Brady as Johnny Bravo:

I love the return of the 70s hair-dos for men. The white "16 Candles" Dance-style shades are also making a comeback for men.

And finally... two people who stood out for being different (Bravo!!!)...

I think these two should get together. They have very similar taste (sort of Mafia-style, no?) --- I personally think that girl's shoes are ridiculous for walking around campus, but let's be honest here, she does look hot and she pulls off the look very well. As for the guy, well, I have a feeling he might have just flown in from a nightclub in Jersey, but I give him applause for breaking down the Abercrombie and Fitch wall and for, at the very least, tucking his shirt in.

So now, my friends, I must go. I hope you've enjoyed "the Fashion Police" annual report from Tucson. Now I must go study for an Arabic test... and my mom is visiting this weekend so I'll be busy entertaining her!

Until later... your Nina Garcia wannabe.